Artist Block Burst (Thanks Bill Viola)

2009
fishing wire, feathers, white yarn, clear cork pegs, glue, speakers, iPod

5 min audio track

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Creativity comes in waves. This, now, I accept as my creed. There was a time when I was consumed with guilt because I did not feel a level creativity flowed within me as I thought it should. This guilt turned to apathy. I felt purposeless and consequently terrified.  With strong support from those around me, I was turned onto the artist Bill Viola’s documentary  video, The Eye of the Heart. Watching it, a churning flood began to brim inside me until I succumbed. Over the course of a week I wept harder than I had in years, for everything and nothing other than to drain myself.  The speed, volume and depth of my pain – my release of pain – coming out in spastic fits felt like a geyser bursting from a concrete floor. I knew I was breaking through to some other place, and that I had to document these visceral experiences. I chose to capture them through a series of audio tracks captured  in the moment. I overlapped these, playing with volume and distortion to simulate the troubled waters that turned within me, sputtering and bursting out.

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